As I reflected on Bro. Zac’s recent sharing on the importance of Brokenness, one question I felt like the Lord had for me is “Do I value Brokenness?”. In the scriptures, we see that God allowed both Moses and Jacob to go through a lot of hardship so that they could be broken. Moses had to be humbled for 40 years in the wilderness and Jacob had to face 20 years of hardship during his stay with his father-in-law Laban in order to be broken.
In Jacob’s case, in addition to 20 years of hardship, he also had the socket of his hip dislocated permanently. Jacob walked leaning on a staff for the rest of his life. It must have been very humiliating for Jacob (who once was a strong man) to be so weak that he needed a staff to walk. But that was the price that Jacob had to pay in order to be broken and to remain broken. God could not have broken Moses and Jacob without the trials that spanned over several years.
God is eager to break us too just like He was eager to break Moses and Jacob. But Brokenness doesn’t come easily nor does it happen overnight. As we see in the case of Moses and Jacob, there is usually a price (trials) that one has to pay in order to be broken. Am I willing to pay that price? Am I willing to go through hardships so that I can be broken by God?
Every trial or circumstance in my life has been permitted by God to break me. Some trials may last for years or may include permanent irreversible changes to our lives similar to the dislocation of Jacob’s hip socket. If I value Brokenness, if I find my treasure in being broken, I will be willing to go through the trials designed by God for my breaking. If I value Brokenness, instead of resisting and complaining in the midst of my trials, I will cooperate with God as He takes me through various circumstances.
Matthew 6:21 NASB - For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
If today, God gives me the following 2 choices, what would I choose?
Option 1: I will BREAK you, but you or your loved ones may not have perfect health, you may be stuck in your career with not much progress, you may have financial difficulty, you may be insulted or harmed by others and in general your life on earth may not be an easy ride.
Option 2: I will take away ALL your problems - you and your loved ones can have perfect health, you can have a flourishing career, understanding boss and easy co-workers, I will not allow anyone to insult or harm you and you can have riches in this world. But you WON’T be broken.
What I choose from the above two options reveals what I treasure in my heart. If I treasure Brokenness in my heart, I would choose the path of Brokenness (Option 1). But if I treasure comfort and ease on this earth, then I would choose the path of ease and comfort (Option 2). I find that there is a natural tendency in my flesh to lean towards wanting a life of ease and comfort. Even if I don’t say it aloud, every time I complain in the midst of my trials, I am saying to God that I prefer ease and comfort (Option 2) over Brokenness (Option 1). But if I value Brokenness, my response to trials would be “Have Thine Own Way Lord!” and instead of complaining in the midst of my trials, I will allow God to have a freehand in my life so that I may be broken.
I’m praying that God would help me see the value of Brokenness and choose this path of Brokenness over and over again. I believe God will help me.